Want You Back
by SiriusMarauderFan
Summary: Xenophilius becomes a bit obsessed after Pandora's death. Reincarnation!AU. one shot.


**Author's Note:** Written for...

Jewel Day Challenge. _Prompts:_ Lovegoods - Write about someone getting over a death. - Reincarnation!AU

Writing Club. _Task:_ Write about someone getting over something.

Assignment #9. _Lesson:_ Divination. _Task:_ Write about a rebirth.

* * *

 **Want You Back**

 _1,682 words_

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Contrary to popular belief, there were some things that not even Xenophilius Lovegood thought were possible, like changing the weather, or travelling to other planets.

The afterlife was also outside of his realm of possibilities. Unless you became a ghost, you simply ceased to exist. Like with so many things, Pandora opened his eyes on the matter. Most wizards believed that there was something, some form of life after death. Pandora took that more literally, insisting that when they died they would have the option of being reincarnated.

She had a bookshelf in their joint office full of volumes on the subject, and she had collected several dozen articles written by witches and wizards who claimed to remember their past lives. She would often force him to read anything she saw as definitive proof that reincarnation was real, but it was still never enough to make Xeno believe.

He never seriously considered reincarnation until the day he came to find his nine-year-old sobbing over the body of her dead mother.

:-:

Pandora was well-loved in all aspects of her life, and this was never more obvious than at her memorial. It lasted for hours with everyone taking turns telling stories about her. Even little Luna had stood up to recite her mother's favorite poem.

The gathering was a beautiful way to honor Pandora, but it was not lost on her friends that her widower had barely moved for the entire night, sitting at the back of the room and staring off into space. He came out of his apparent daze only once, to embrace Luna after her recital, but shut down immediately after.

It didn't take long for the rumors to start that Xenophilius had never loved Pandora to begin with, or maybe he'd killed her after all. He let them slide, keeping Luna away from the gossipers. They knew what was real and that was all that mattered, and anyway, he had more pressing matters to deal with.

Reincarnation was a tricky business, he quickly found out. In the first week after Pandora's accident, he managed to read through close to twenty of her books on the subject, but none of them had a clear answer to his questions.

Most of the so-called experts who had penned the journals believed that reincarnation was something that happened naturally when a person died. If a person's soul did not linger as a ghost, they would move directly from one body to the next, in which case Xenophilius would be looking for a child born at the exact date and time of his wife's death.

However, many authors were also under the impression that reincarnation was a choice made by the living. They suggested that, through a number of ancient rituals, he might be able to call Pandora's spirit back into a new body of his choosing. It was tricky, questionably legal, and probably a complete hoax, but Xeno was willing to do whatever it took to get his wife back.

:-:

Eleven days post-Pandora, Xenophilius made his way to St. Mungo's on a fool's errand. He wasn't sure how much information he could get about patients, but he had to give it a shot.

It was the middle of the day but the maternity ward was surprisingly empty. He strode over to the welcome witch's desk and smiled at the young woman.

"Can I help you?" she asked. He noticed her eyes flick over his shoulder, probably searching for his wife. She focused back on him quickly.

"I'm Xenophilius Lovegood, editor of the Quibbler. I'm writing an article on the benefits of being born under a certain sign. I was wondering if you would be able to tell me the names of the children born on September seventeenth?"

The welcome witch pursed her lips. "I'm sorry, sir. Unless you're a relative, I can't divulge that kind of information."

Xeno sighed. "I figured as much. Thank you anyway."

He returned home defeated and without a new plan of action. He had already scoured the Daily Prophet for birth announcements and found none for girls born on the date. His enquiry at the hospital was a longshot when homebirths still made up the majority of magical births, but it had been his only chance.

The Ministry would be unhelpful in his search. And the Quill of Acceptance would only write a child's name down to attend Hogwarts once they showed signs of magic. It would take him _years_ to find Pandora's new identity. And, if he were being honest with himself, he wasn't too fond of this route.

If this type of reincarnation were truly possible, Pandora would have been reborn in the most literal sense of the word. Even if it did take him years to find her, what then? She would still be a child of five, or eleven, or perhaps seventeen. She would look like his wife but have none of her memories and worse still, she would be younger than her own daughter.

Luna needed a mother, not a little sister.

It was this nagging thought that drove Xenophilius to reread his late wife's collection of books until he once more found the supposed ritual that would summon her spirit into a new body. Now he just needed to find the host.

:-:

Finding an empty body turned out to be more difficult than he first imagined. Unsurprisingly, most people seemed to be pretty attached to their bodies and weren't willing to give them up no matter how much Xeno pleaded with them.

He was finally nearing his breaking point, ready to give up entirely on the endeavor, when he found an angel on his doorstep late on New Year's Day.

"Mr. Lovegood, my name is Jocelyn Willoughby," the young woman introduced as she quickly pushed her way into the house and shed her winter cloak. "I heard you're looking to attempt one of Stefan Slovan's summoning spells. I thought you might need some assistance."

"Willoughby?" Xeno repeated, following the woman as she showed herself to the kitchen. "I know that name."

She helped herself to a cup of tea and sat at the kitchen table, tapping the book he'd left open there. "Yes. It looks as though you're familiar with my older work."

His eyes widened. "You're J.D. Willoughby? My wife loves your work – _loved_ your work, I mean."

Jocelyn hummed thoughtfully. "So it's your wife that you're trying to resurrect, is it?"

"Yes. Pandora." Xeno retrieved a photograph to show her, one of Pandora cuddling Luna, taken on their girl's third birthday. "She loved to experiment with her spells. I'm not really sure what happened, what she was trying to accomplish, but it went wrong three months ago."

"You're sure you want her back badly enough to try something so temperamental as this?"

"Of course. Pandora was everything to me." He tapped the baby in the picture. "Our daughter, Luna is only nine years old. That's far too young to be without her mother."

Jocelyn nodded, sipping her tea. "I'll admit that I've been unsuccessful in completing one of Slovan's spells myself, but I've studied him for years. I will help you."

"Really? Because the only thing I'm missing is-"

"A host. I know. It's a common problem everyone runs into when trying out a resurrection. Nevertheless, I will help. In the name of experimentation, I will offer my body as a new host for your wife." She said it casually, as if she were lending him a cup of sugar. "I have no family, no ties. My only request is for Pandora to continue her own experiments. We mustn't let setbacks stop up from our passions, after all."

It took twenty minutes for the pair to set up everything for the ritual, and for Xeno to slip upstairs and make sure Luna was sound asleep before they began.

The incantation itself took a while to memorize and Xeno made four attempts at repeating before he was sure he got it right. It had taken so long that he worried Jocelyn had fallen asleep in the middle of the circle she'd drawn on his floor. Then her eyes fluttered open and she looked frantically around the room until she saw him, smiling as he reached out to help her up.

"Xeno," she whispered, latching onto him. "You did it."

"Pandora?" he questioned, unconvinced. He pulled away and looked in her eyes. "It's really you?"

"It is, love. I'm back." She placed a hand on his cheek. "And you believed me. You read my books."

"I didn't have a choice. I needed you." He ran a hand over hair the color of coal – not his wife's beautiful blonde hair. His breath hitched. "We've missed you."

"I miss you too, and Luna. So much." She let her hand fall, pulling away as he held on tighter. "But I have to go."

"What? No. I just got you back. The spell worked, didn't it? You're back."

"It worked," she said, slowly backing up. "For a few minutes, anyway. I'm glad. I was so upset that I couldn't say goodbye."

Xeno sighed. "It's okay, we'll figure it out. I've got help now. We'll find a way to get you back permanently."

"No, Xeno, no." She looked to the clock on the mantle. "I've got to go soon, and I'm not coming back. You can't try this again, honey. You need to let me go."

"But you can stay with me and Luna."

"I'm dead. I can't live someone else's life, no matter how much I want to hold our girl again." She reached out and took his hand. "I'll always love you two."

Just as quickly as she had returned, Pandora was gone.

Jocelyn collapsed in Xeno's arms. He carried her to the sofa and sat down on the floor beside her, staring at the useless circle on his floor.

He had been so close to getting her back, but it didn't matter now. Pandora wasn't coming back, but he still had a daughter who needed him. It was time he moved on for Luna's sake.


End file.
